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In life, I have found that the most fitting on times are the ones we are literally never ready for.  Like that moment when you do something you have wanted to do because you are given the opportunity to do such.  I have this opportunity when I was 15.  My life has been "Tegan Rowan Stryker" since I was 15.  I have never looked back, and yet sometimes it's harder than most people can seem to imagine.  All this political nonsense and agenda that makes it hard for people who break from the "Gender Norms" are those who have stepped out of the box.  Yet, in life, stepping out of the box is a red flag for being persecuted and slandered.  The change I have seen to the Trans* community where I live has been the most interesting thing I can imagine.  In just a short time roughly 9 months,  we have grown in numbers that reach about 100.  That's the visibility we need to get started to become better at being who we are.  To make the waves we want and in the time frame we want.  All these people are necessary, brave, and awe inspiring.

    In the short time I have known all the people I have.  They give me the strength that I once found hard to have.  I may never have had their experiences or had their tribulations.  Though, the thought of them sharing their lives with me.  That truly is the best thing a person can ask for.  To be part of their lives and live their lives now with them.  That's what is giving me the power to get up every day and say "Hey, I exist!"  I've had a hard time validating myself for the longest time.  With their help, in the past year.  I've made more strides in both internally and externally.  Something that is harder than most could imagine, but now that I am here.  I can sigh my relief and live not only for myself, but for those about me.

    Learning that the world can shape you is scary, but what's even more scarier is when you get to the point that you notice it has. My experiences have led me to this point in time... right here, right now.  I can say that I have changed more so since I was 18 than I have in any other time frame.  It's both scary and exciting, because to be who I want to be I need to do this.  I've been contemplating doing several things (distancing myself from people, running for a seat on a very important board, and finally starting a project that is going to shape the way we work as a collective in our area).  I've made the decision on two of three.  The third is the hardest, because I love the people I know.  Sadly, to do the work I wish to do.  I have to be a different person.  Honestly, I think it's time to have that come to light.

    In a final note: I hope we all can move forward and attain the ideals we set for ourselves.  It's quite a gamble when you think about how to go about matters at hand.  Though to have that final decision.  That's the biggest gamble because someway, shape, or form.  It can affect those about us.  We live for ourselves and yet, it's a fallacy and flaw sometimes.

Tegan Rowan Stryker